Monday, April 6, 2009

Letter for HIM

There's a thousand mails i need to tell HIM
There's a lot of questions i need to ask HIM
There are thousand or million words i wanna talk and chit chat with HIM

And right now, in this time, and this moment, I can't ignore it anymore.
I knew, time just gone and pass by like that.
I couldn't hold the time and begging it to stop for a while.
But, I need and I wish I could..
I wish I can freeze the time and make anything in silence mode.
I need time for my self to be alone, I need some time to relax.
Gosh! I am freak off.. I just felt anything that I did is nothing.
I am mad. I wanna yell', cryin',  screamin'..

Dear, My father
I knew, I have been escape from you
I run  away and ignore you for the long time.
I just too exacting with my world activities and never turn back to hear your call.
I miss the time when I did conversation and told anything that I want share with you.
I miss you, Lord.
I really miss you and need you rite now.
Your child is having a big problem.
I don't know, i felt this sems is just a freakin' sems.
I couldn't breath, I couldn't smile, I couldn't think properly.
I knew I wrong to crushed and thought everything was worst.
Can I just breath for a while?
Sometimes I need rains for clear all my burden and wash my sin from all that i have been do.
I want to freeze the time, I wanna walk under freezing time and feel this world is just mine.
I wanna breath deeply and think 'My life is just awesome and wonderful'

God, Could do that?
Could all my wish happen?
I am really not in a good condition.
All the pain is just shouting out and wish everything wishes could be come true..

But, in the end I knew..
All I need is You, Lord.
I knew, I need to come home and leave inside with you.
I need you immediately, rite now and this moment
because I can't stand without you.
My tasks and my responsibilties are waiting for nicely in their line.
They need me to finish all this tasks so that I can feel better.
But rite now, I need HIM in here to make me calm down, cheers, and change me to be an old Christin.
Christin that full of smile, passion, and psitive thinking.

Well, I hope this letter will arrive in the right place.
I hope he's listening right now.
and I hope my life will getting better after all this storm and thunder shouted me.
I hope this letter will bring me into a next level whereby I feel safety and no more pain in here.

I miss you,
and I need you..


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